Barriers to bonding

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Think a minute...It’s a fact of life and human nature: “Everybody needs somebody.” For our life to be satisfying and successful, we need close friends. But we face barriers that can hinder or completely stop us from bonding with people and enjoying close, meaningful relationships.   

The first barrier to bonding with others is our painful past. We find it difficult to trust others because we have been deeply hurt by someone before, so we are afraid to open our heart to anyone again.

We may not want to get close and share our real feelings with others because in the past we were criticized or even rejected for being open and honest. So now to protect ourselves from that possible pain, we do not let others know our true feelings and the person we really are inside.   

Some of us were fortunate to be born to parents who gave us loving acceptance, affection, and attention, so we learned early how to have close, open relationships. But people who are hurting and wounded from their past often are not free to fully trust others and develop close, honest relationships. 

Another big barrier to bonding with others is our wrong thinking about ourselves. We may think we are just not good enough to be truly liked or loved by others. We think something is wrong with us, either because we were actually told that or we simply did not feel genuinely loved and accepted when we were young.

Finally, another barrier to bonding with others is our confused, wrong understanding of our Maker. We do not really believe that God fully loves and accepts us just the way we are; or we think that if we trust God and live His way, then He will take away all of our freedom and fun in life. But actually it is the exact opposite.

God has done everything He possibly can so we can enjoy living His right, satisfying way He created for us. The boundaries He gives us are simply to protect us from hurting ourselves and destroying our own life of happiness.  

So if you have struggled to have close relationships with your family or friends because of past pain and hurts, or wrong thinking about yourself, Jesus can start changing that today.

If you ask Him to take full charge of your heart and life, He can start healing your past wounds and tearing down those barriers between you and those you care about. Only then can you finally have the life of real love He created you to have and enjoy. Just think a minute…

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